Friday, May 29, 2009

Grouch and Grow

Greetings, all. This will have to be a quick one since I'm on my break at work.

One of the most teeth-grinding experiences of dialysis is not getting poked with a ginormous needle-- it is having to meet with the social worker and/or nutritionist. These dialysis workers are almost always the nicest people. But oy! I can do without those appointments. I know they are just doing their jobs...but couldn't we handle such matters via email or video conference or something? I only feel the need to meet with them when I need something-- and most times I don't need anything. I always ask for my dialysis lab reports-- the real reports, not the smiley face ones... and other than setting up visiting dialysis, I haven't had much call for a social worker. I like being in charge of my care, and usually can find the answers I need on my own. And frankly, I have trimmed everything away from my diet that I intend to, and I can make the changes I wish after viewing my lab results. I dunno! I wish this was something I could do away with.

Something else I could do without...hmmm... those pesky monthly visits with the nephrologist. Now in my current setting, it isn't a problem. I love the nephrologist we have heading up the research study. And she visits us in the clinic-- at night, no less! She's a fantastic doctor-- one of the best I've ever had. I'm talking about the visits with past nephrologists. Where I would drive 45 minutes to basically be weighed and have my bp taken-- two things I can do at home and did all the time during my dialysis sessions. I would spend less than 5 minutes chitchatting with the doctor and that would be the end of the appointment. And the end of my $450. I dunno... I prefer to go to the doctor when there's a problem, or when I need some answers to some research I've done (and most times, that could be handled by email). My time is limited and valuable and any appointments I have to keep need to be necessary and solve problems-- before the parking meter gives out and my checkbook!

Oh and here's another thing I can do without... social workers bringing up patients that have been on dialysis forever-- like that's an achievement I want to emulate. Not! Almost everyone who's been on dialysis long term, that I have encountered, is crippled...or has multiple amputations or two dozen other really bad health elements. But they're still alive (cough, cough). And even if I were to beat the odds and be healthy, I wouldn't want a long-term life of dialysis. I'm coming up on 5 years now...and I'm inching towards my limit. Tilt! Game over. It's an effective treament that allows me to have a transplant long-term, or it's curtains. I have no interest in being on dialysis long term. I really should make that clear to any social workers that comes within 50 miles of me. UGH!

You grouch, you grow. And then you die. Which seems rather merciful, sometimes. Not today, necessarily. I would like to get my house fully cleaned before I go. And clean ain't happen anytime soon. hehehe. But the day you hear me say, "Merry Maids came by and my place is soooo clean..." well, you'll know it's time for the Michelle's Superstupendous Exit Party/Rave. Get your dancing shoes ready....

Michelle/Treasure says "Nitey Nite and Party On"

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