Sunday, May 24, 2009

Keeping Busy

Wow, a lot of time has passed since I last blogged. I've been superbusy at work and my computer was down for a couple of weeks while Dell decided whether or not they were going to own up to the problems the XPS M1330 has. le sigh.

What's been happening on the nocturnal dialysis front? Well, I have been reading at dialysis the past couple of weeks. I started and finished all 4 of the Twilight books. That got me on a vampire novel kick. I'm not saying that Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn will join the great literature canon, but there's something to be said for selling a gazillion copies. Kudos Stephenie Meyer. Maybe I'll start a novelization of my dialysis experiences. Chapter One: Dr. Youknowwhoyouare, take a size 14 dialysis needle and stick it where it don't shine!

These Twilight stories of a teenage girl who falls in with a vampire classmate and his vampiric family are perfect dialysis reading. Why? Well, it's nice to read about someone else getting the blood sucked out of them, ya know? I wish I could have a vampire lover who would pierce my supple neck with his pointy fangs and suck all the bad stuff out. That would beat dialysis any day.

And I can deal with the undead stuff-- I'm already undead from my kidney disease anyway. I'm living on borrowed time, should be dead, but lo and behold I'm still sucking air. And, hey, in the vampire book I just finished, Robin McKinley's Sunshine, the vampire lovers have super long-lasting erections. I could get a side order of vampire loving with my fangoric dialysis treatment. Sweet! I think I've got something here worth exploring. Now I just need to find a willing vampire...

What else is going on? Well, I've written about personnel issues before. Ahem. I still don't think the personnel issues are ironed out. I know my dialysis center is searching for staff because I've seen their ads posted on the internet. We had a tech come in and "try out" nocturnal the other night. Of course, that would be the night my blood pressure (uncharacteristically) bottomed out and I started projectile vomiting, hehehe. I don't know if that tech is going return. We have this tech now-- let's call her Gertie Gumdrop-Britches, who is a fantastic tech and she has been with us since the beginning of the study. I do hope they keep her. She knows her stuff...and she knows me by now. I really need consistency in my dialysis staff. I'm not sure I can continue doing the nocturnal if they diddle with the staffing. Unless they are bringing in a team of vampire techs and nurses. In which case, Gertie, it's been nice knowing ya! hehehe

I don't know that I'm going to be able to enter the Miss Fistula Beauty Pageant. My fistula took a hit (metaphorically, well, mostly) last week when we tried to stick in the no-man's land again. It infiltrated-- yet again. That makes 3 years of trying to use my upper arm, and I think we have proven conclusively that it can't be done. Likewise with establishing buttonholes. My fistula is just resistant to the whole idea. And we have tried about 4 times now...over the past 3 years and they just won't take-- no matter how careful we have been to establish the buttonholes the right way. My fistula's uncooperativeness just means that I'm going to have to find an alternative to dialysis.

Oh CureforFSGS where are you?

Until next time...nitey nite!


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